Monday, May 7, 2018

Fear of Possession


They say I disappear.
I can be “Intimidating”
Not just give you the cold shoulder,
But can fucking freeze you out.
You see, my default is rather feline.
Though I yearn for companionship,
I am quite content, satisfied and fulfilled being alone.

And yet…
Sometimes when I lift my eyes in your direction,
the insatiable hunger of fire can suddenly
flash and lap you up in its heat.
It threatens to burn everything in its wake
as my eyes dance over you
like a cat toying with its prey.

So I try to spare you,
try to keep my energy contained.
But I admit at times it escapes in a moment of carelessness
and flickers like flame.
Sometimes I get so tired of holding
this raging passion under my skin,
that when I think I’ve met a worthy match,
I long to let her out to play.

But please don’t be fooled by my flirtatious dance.
Know that I will never let you own me.
So don’t try to bridle me,
or put me in any fucking stall.
I don’t want your ring or your name.
And certainly need no hero.
If I feel the heat of your brand,
I will smile and nod
as I gracefully evade your grip.
Skittish and frisky,
I’ll simply prance away.

Though I sometimes
tire of dancing alone,
miss the warmth of body heat in my bed,
I prefer the loneliness of being alone,
for loneliness is much more painful
while pacing the fence line of a failed relationship
gazing longingly at the open green outside.
I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready to be contained.

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